Federporn Friday: RFed. Now 28% McDreamier on grass. Fuckmegentlywithachainsaw.

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Dear Tennis Gods,

Screw you.

Kind regards,

doots

Now that we’ve gotten the formalities out of the way, time to get started on Federporn Friday (reloaded!). This week’s theme is unsurprisingly Wimbledon. Because despite all my grudges against the tournament (just because it’s Fed’s favourite doesn’t mean it’s mine), Wimbledon remains the tournament that brings out the best in McFederer.

As utter delicious as he is on all surfaces, Roger Federer on grass carries an extra sense of stillness and serenity.

And the hair, as usual, is 99% premium fair trade cocoa. You know it true!


But of course, McFeduhruh at Wimbledon isn’t all about grace in stillness, Woger wows equally in motion. Cue music: I BELIEVE I CAN FLYYYY. I BELIEVE I CAN TOUCH THE SKYYY.

… I SPREAD MY WINGS AND FLY AWAYYY.

Bend it like Federer yo!

Not only is his tennis music for our purist souls, Wimbledon also provides the perfect opportunity for some hair choreography by McFed.

Dootsie tried to imitate … to a lesser degree of success.

Of course, Woger at Wimbledon isn’t just about elegance and middle-class upyourassism. For all his graceful snootiness, Roger will always be the dorky chum-chum that he is.

Oh Federdork, never change. Here’s a glass of warm milk for ya! And some fairy bread too?

And when you get tired McFeddy, you know who has the most comfy shoulders to rest on in all of Wimbledon. Yes you do!

Like any good dancer, Woger McFed knows when he must point his toes and open up his shoulders. Take that Pistol Pete!

My favourite: hair choreograph, pointed toes, belted shorts. Tennis nirvana.

What are you favourite pictures of Woger at Wimbledon? Favourite matches? Most memorable moments? Do share!

Because Federporn Friday is back in business. Get off my lawn bitches!

xx doots

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18 responses to “Federporn Friday: RFed. Now 28% McDreamier on grass. Fuckmegentlywithachainsaw.”

  1. evie says :

    You are good at this. Very good. Thanks for returning!

  2. Deborah says :

    Wimbledon 2006, the year of the cream jacket is the date I hold dear as the point where I officially lost my mind over Roger Federer. It had been coming on gradually and then, pow, I was just gone. I spent the next few months reading everything I could about him, just falling deeper and deeper. It just so happens that I watched that final again last night. There is something other worldly about Roger in white against the backdrop of the green grass. Two years ago, two months before the darkest day in the life of a Federer fan, I stood in front of the exhibit at the Wimbledon Museum that featured Roger’s outfit from his 2007 victory. I stood there so long, the guard asked if I was okay. I stood there and re-lived that moment when Roger hit that last ball and fell to the ground. I could hear the American commentator saying “It’s five for Federer!”. I remembered his struggle to quickly put on the long pants and getting them on backwards. I stood there and got teary all over again.

  3. Amandita_FP says :

    FPF again!!! so cool! loved the post Doots. =)
    My fav moment was when he won #15 and jumped like a kid, he was so happy & so was I =)
    There have been great matches at Wimbledon, but I think I couldn’t chose just one.. but I did love last year’s shot around the net on his 1st round match…

  4. Luna says :

    Beautiful, Sweet, and Sigh~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Thank the tennis gods for the green, green grass~~~~~~~~~~~~& Roger!

    Love your posts.
    Really love the pic of you trying to copy Roger…………….still laughing……………………….sooo cute.

    Keep writing.
    I’ll keep reading…Your words make me smile..always.

  5. judy says :

    one of the best fpfs yet! grace, power, elegance, class and killer hair with the wimby backdrop. feddybear in his natural element. awesome.

    deborah, your post reminded me of how lucky we are that we get to watch a living legend! that hit me when i went to the intl tennis hall of fame last aug and they already had fed’s outfit and racquet from his triumph at roland garros! threw me for a loop! i was so excited and in awe. :)

  6. pban says :

    good on ya doots, personally I don’t think the no porn strategy was working.For Fed its best to keep things as they are .As for Feddy on grass in whites ,I have no idea how someone can send me into an alternating state of fedgasmic bliss and suicidal neurosis over 2 weeks but Fed has been doing it successfully since 2004 .Best wimby …..2006 bagelling Rafa and the 2005 final was just magic.

  7. marcoiac says :

    Favorite set: fedal final (1st, I believe): fed bagels rafa. Priceless.
    Favorite moment: can’t remember exactly when, during the second fedal final, but definitely a turnaround moment: fed runs around the ball in his backhand corner and hits a FH winner down the line. Pure art.
    Favorite picture, yet to be taken: you at wimbly 2010 with a federbanner!

  8. Jack says :

    My most memorable moment was the 2007 Wimbledon final because thats when I went over to the darkside! :D After that I knew that I could no longer watch a Federer match with zen and calmness.

    Its kinda wierd though as before that happened, I never really thought I’d get into a sport like that. I mean, I used to watch Tennis but it was only really when it was on TV. So I used to think they just played 4 Slams a year and that was it! :D

    But during that 2007 final, I found myself, as the match progressed, wanting Fed to win more and more. And then he won and I was so happy! I was a changed man after that!!

    The only downside is that I used to make fun of my brother for getting all crazy during Football matches. Now he mocks me during Fed matches! :(

    I must say though, I do wish I could summon some of that inner zen nowadays……unfortunately I can’t.

  9. breadstix says :

    Oh my gosh, he looks as if he’s three feet off the ground in the first ‘flying’ pic. *worships*

    Oh, Wimby 2007, that was a good year when Feddy got me into tennis. :’) Thanks for teh FPF (it’s back?), mucho appreciated.

  10. jfK says :

    Just beautiful. Watching Rog at Wimbledon is the ultimate tennis porn.
    The Wimbledon 2007 final is my favorite. I won’t ever forget matchpt when he smashed the ball, the roar of the crowd, and how he fell with his hands around his face in disbelief. Gives me goosebumps everytime I watch it. I also like Wimbledon 2008 1st round where Hrbaty came to sit with Roger on the changeover. Just speaks volumes about the kind of person Roger is.

    • judy says :

      totally agree on the favorite points! which year was it when rog played super mario and crossed the net to playfully throw a ball at him, because mario hit a ball right at fed? that was such a cute moment bet friends. :)

  11. pban says :

    GOOD GOD jfk how can you remember anything from wimby 2008 for me all I remember is the utter desolation at 2am

  12. TGIF says :

    Favorite Fed at Wimby moments?

    How about an oldie but goodie: the on-court interview w/ Sue Barker after his first win in 2003?

    From sweet “I was always joking as a boy that I was gonna win this, and now I have it!”,
    to the Federdork classic:”I love watching myself”, which caused Mirka to hide her face in her hands, probably thinking “there goes my idiot b-friend exposing his narcissism to the world . . . ”
    And of course ends in true Fedfashion w/ his voice breaking due to tears –

    In retrospect it was probably this interview that made me a Fedfan. He was so cute. He played so pretty. He cared so much. I loved watching him too!

  13. TGIF says :

    Clarification: by “cute” I meant personality; not looks. Gosh he looked awful at that tournament; unshaven and very pale, which made his face look sort of puffy.

    Looks didn’t grow on me ’til later.

  14. The Fan Child says :

    This is classic stuff – love it!

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