Shop til you drop: A Shopaholics Guide to the Tennis World.
With Christmas nearing, Roger Federer has released his annual calendar for 2010, all proceeds to the RF Foundation. Having found myself bizarrely in the “Shop” section of RF.com for the first time, I decided to check out the stores of other players to see how the Fed fares in online retail.
1. Shop Federer
Surprisingly understocked, the Roger Federer shop keeps a few red RF caps, RF Foundation’s tshirt, fan calendar, and stamps released by the Swiss post-office a few years ago, signed by Roger.
Clicking on anything gear related takes you to a link to the Tennis Warehouse. Otherwise, all proceeds from the shop go towards the Roger Federer Foundation, supporting children in two towns in South Africa and Ethiopia.
The calendar, if I may add, is totally ace.
2. Shop Nadal
These players’ shops are certainly not living up to expectations. For starters, my ebay account lists more items than Federer and Nadal’s shops combined.
Compared to the Fed, Nadal’s shop has a few more printed publications, like “The World of Rafael Nadal: the Secrets of his Success”, and Rafa Nadal’s official biography.
But like Roger, all gears are sold through Tennis Warehouse or a sponsor’s site, and that aside, Rafa’s store seems to be equally understocked.
3. Shop Djokovic
It became apparently to me within seconds of entering “Shop Novak” that the Djokovic’s take the word “Shop” very literally.
So literally that Shop Novak is actually a physical store at “Boulevard Arsenija Čarnojevića 95a, New Belgrade”.
That. Ladies and gentlemen. Is the place to be.
Doots’ personal Shop Novak must-haves include:
1) I heart Nole tshirts.
2) Novak Djokovic pens and ipod pouch
3) Life couldn’t be complete if I couldn’t drink from a Nole drink bottle.
4. Shop Mandy
First of all, a monkey face without body carpet is like a cat without fur.
Secondly, Mandy’s store pushes novelty to the brink of hilarity.
For the communists among us, how about a Chairman Mandy tshirt?
Or perhaps Mandy Bears and “Game Set Murray” car stickers are more your thang, You shtinking pile of capitalist turd!?
It’s okay. We don’t judge.
5. Shop Masha.
Compared to the guys, very few of the girls’ sites actually have a shop section. Ivanovic’s Shop takes you to Tennis Warehouse. Neither Vee or Ree have a shop section, although they do link to third party websites selling their products.
But when all else fails, consumerism can always depend on Maria Sharapova for its salvation.
Moving out sweetie? Decorate your bedroom with life-sized Sharapova vinyl art!
Getting gifts for that significant other? Sharapova’s perfume comes with a squishy little Siberian husky named Sasha.
6. Shop Australian Open.
I never had time to look through the shop properly. Because after loading the first page, I caught a kangaroo and a koala doing things that kangaroos and koalas should never be caught doing.
Now I’m traumatised for life.
So what’s your favourite player merchandise? Which star has the best store? And where should Andy Murray’s face be printed next?
The jury is out on that one.