MY RESOLVE WILL NOT BE WEAKENED YO!
No sooner had I decided on a moratorium on Federporn did you fangirls move into action, TRYING TO CORRUPT MY MIND WITH IMAGES OF MORAL TURPITUDE.
This was a message from Roger, conveyed by Lizibef. HUSSY ROYALE YOU!
NO. I. DO. NOT.
Dootsie was soooo like “whatever dude.”
And then JFK just waltzed in here with the big guns. YER THINK YOU CAN JUST WALTZE HERE WITH THE BIG GUNS DO YA? BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF.
And no, by the big guns, I don’t mean the sunnies (which are indeed very adulterous).
Nor am I referring to the puny left arm, clearly in need of A SLOW AND PAINFUL WAX.
I’m not even talking about the “Roger Federer, Mission Impossible II – serious nappies for serious shit” face.
Oh no. I’m talking about the Mighty Babes, with their little feet stuck up in the air…
And their little pouts!
And their expressions of “mummy, who iz dis touching my bum?“
MY MIND IS STRONG, BUT MY OVARIES. OH MY OVARIES.
JFK, Lizibef, YOU DON’T PLAY NICE. DOOTSIE IS NOT HAPPY WITH YOU BOTH. You have been warned.