For fuck sake hit the right one, ’cause the future of tennis depends on the others.

It ain’t US Open time until you see the lame Youtube ads. Here are this year’s selection.

Roger Federer. Wearing pants.

Oh well, nothing a little imagination can’t fix.

Meanwhile, Rafa went all SPANISH Masterchef on us.

Umm. He tried.

And the girls, of course. Caroline Wozniacki. (Is it just me or has she gained a lot of weight?)

Did I put Bob and Mike under “the girls, of course”? Oops.

I love Venus. That is all.

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13 responses to “For fuck sake hit the right one, ’cause the future of tennis depends on the others.”

  1. heba1992 says :

    we call the shrimp in egypt “gambary” its very very close to “gambas”..thats a shame..sorry but i love roger xD
    thats it 🙂

  2. FortuneCookie says :

    I didn’t want to sound catty,but I’ve thought for a couple of months now that Caro looks like she’s gained pounds,not to the point where she’s ‘fat’ though!Probably just down to the incredibly unflattering Stella outfits 😛

  3. TennisAce says :

    Caro has bulked up somewhat. Same thing with Kirilenko. It is the Adidas Development Training Program quick fix method to easy results. For some reason Reyes and Company out in Las Vegas believe that all the players need lots of muscle in order to be successful on the Tour. We have seen it happen with the ladies above, Verdasco and many others. After awhile all these players suffer the same fate: movement. Their movement on which many of them relied is severely affected.

    I have no idea why the Adidas Program believes that what worked for Agassi almost 20 years ago will now work for today’s players. Agassi did not rely on movement as much as he relied on his quickness (which is an entirely different thing). Agassi played first strike tennis like no other player. He took control of rallies from the return and never let go. These days most of the women are trying to do that and apparently getting lots of muscle and having bulky thighs and arms is the way to go.

    Then again, it could be the very FUGLY Stelly dresses that she wears. My goodness those things are ugly and they just do not seem to fit well.

    I agree that she should use the Serena method, but then Serena seemed to have been born with those arms and legs. Saw her 2002 USO semifinal match last night against Davenport and the difference between both women could not be more pronounced. On the one side you had a the fit, powerful with the bodacious ass in a black cat suit rifling serves and returns and ground strokes and grunting as she did so (man Serena was fast then). On the other side you had the tall, lanky clean ball striker with the poor movement and the dour expression. Boy, you really had to be a fan of clean ball striking to be a fan of Davenport. Just too much dourness there man.

  4. jfK says :

    I hope Roger can amaze us again in NY 😀
    I think it will suck for me, being American b/c I know ESPN is going to shove Melanie Oudin and John Isner down our throats this year.

    • elisha says :

      I don’t think they’ll shove Melanie too much in our faces. She hasn’t exactly had stellar outcomes after USO last year, no? (I’m assuming so since if she didn’t it would’ve been headline news here…!) But for sure, Isner will be all over ESPN.

      I’m going to USO again this year(last year I got Hantuchova, Mandy, and SERENA!) so I better see Fed! lol.

  5. Wonderbra says :

    Roger might be wearing pants, but he’s standing butt-wards for more than 8 seconds, so THANK YOU, dear imagination.

    Thanks for the vids, Dootz.

  6. roadrunnerz says :

    Federpoop better make it to the round of 16, since I’ve got tickets (my first major! yay!).

    That is all I have to say. 🙂

  7. Jack says :

    Have you seen this doots??:

    Thought you might like it. 🙂

  8. Freudo says :

    Hi, Doots,
    I enjoy you so much!!!!!
    re C. Woz’s build, she fluctates, I think, looks trim even in her tennis gown this week, check out this pic

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