The Federcone: now comes in strawberry or chocolate.


As if Federer – with his potato nose and chocolate curls, his 11-secret-herbs-and-spices legs – wasn’t delicious enough, you’ve now gone and coated him in strawberry icing too!

You don’t play fair, Nike. I’m not having your Swooshy babies anymore! 😦


What do you want me to say about the match? Was it so squeaky clean that you could eat off it, lick it clean and use it as a mirror? Of course not. Who could forget the Furdlike way in which he shanked away a 5-2 lead in the first set?

But then again, I didn’t really notice – I was too busy stuffing my face with a strawberry milkshake after taking one look at that outfit.

Had it been a 62 63 match, you would’ve seen a very happy Doots and a crowd slightly cheated out of their bang for buck. As it turns out, the first set provided a good workout for Fed and those fans who are a little out practice with their frazzling.

The second set, on the other hand, made me realise that I’ve missed his tennis.

… So there’s that.

The numbers, for anyone who wants to crunch them.


The porn, for anyone who wants a strawberry milkshake with chocolate swirls …

Roger 4

Roger 3

… and a Federcone, made with crunchy wafer biscuit. Om nom nom.

In other matches of the day, Maria Sharapova overcame a hotmess of a serve and a hotmess of an opponent to prevail over Sveta, 64 16 62. The serve – as long as the scoreline ain’t close, it doesn’t bother her any more than it bothers every other WTA player out there. But bring out the deuces and breakpoints and watch it become such a foreign part of her game that even her immune system wants to repel it.


As for Sveta – she showed up. Not only did she show up, she took a set off a tough, mentally predatory opponent. Given the emotional and physical exhaustion she just went through in San Diego last week, that’s more than I expected from her. See you in Montreal.


In other matches of the day, Soderling continued his ominous march to No 4 today with a 3 set win over the Importance, 4-6, 6-4, 6-4. Only saw the last set: one giant shiftest of unreturned serves, wild groundies sailing past the baseline, Gulbis collected 36 winners and 38 unforced errors, to Soderling’s 34-33. Hardly shiny by anyone’s standards. But the reason Sodderkins has transformed himself from a top 30 player into a top 5 player in 18 months is precisely his ability to win matches on a bad day. In other words – bad match, solid win.

On a slight more off-topic note, whatever pact Ernie made with the Devil with regards to the hair? Unmake it. Scalp, face, or elsewhere.


In the battle of the Daveeds, it was the Argentine that triumphed – barely – winning 75 36 63. In stark contrast to Soderling v Gulbis, the Daveeds lived and died by their return games as they traded 11 breaks of serve. Nalbandian won the day as Ferru fell apart completely on serve in the final set, but watching him wobble over the finish line today, one wonders if he’ll have enough gas left in the tank for Robredo.

I hope so. Because Nalbandian v Soderling sounds almost as tasty as a Federcone.

By the way, what is this? And why do people find it him smokin’/endearing/anything other than downright creepy?


Tennis fandom. It makes no sense.

xx doots


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19 responses to “The Federcone: now comes in strawberry or chocolate.”

  1. heba1992 says :

    hey doots..i hope u still remember me i am @heba1992 from twitter..i deleted my account…anyway..that was nice and more importantly thanks for the strawberry milkshake wit chocolate swirls ❤
    take care xx

  2. Deborah says :

    Doots, can I just say that strawberry is my favorite flavor! Maybe it’s the long layoff but he looked so, so, so good to me. Broad shoulders in a pink shirt, oh my! And the tennis, with a few hiccups, wasn’t bad either. Here’s hoping he can get a few more matches under his belt.

    • dootsiez says :

      “Here’s hoping he can get a few more matches under his belt.”

      What is this? Modest expectations coming out of a Federer fan? Sign of the times I tell ya!

      • Deborah says :

        What can I say? My brain’s been frazzled! I’m watching the replay of the match just to watch his feet. No doubt paint is currently drying on the Tennis Channel.

  3. heba1992 says :

    i’ll always be here….cuz i cant live without allineedisapicketfence..its like a drug to me ❤ ❤ ❤

  4. TennisAce says :

    I tell you watching that match last night and posting on at the same time, there were so many Fed fans that I had not spoken to since Wimbledon. This man makes tennis what it is and even the commentators were talking about what he brings to the sport. Just by him speaking the Toronto crowd erupted. There was not an empty seat in the house. People love him. I cried last night because I think about what will happen to this great sport when he is no longer around.

    His voice, the forehand when on, the shanking backhand (yes it is a shot) and the arsenal of shots, especially the forehand drop shot. Fantastic. I loved the net play last night and already you can tell that once he fine tunes it, the players will have to start coming up with good passing shots. I loved that he was returning so fearlessly.

    In short, it was good to see him back. Long may he continue to play this sport.

    • Luna says :

      Great post, TennisAce~~~~~~When he’s not around ~~hopefully many, many years from now~~~I just may have to stop watching tennis.

      Loved that strawberry shirt!!

    • roadrunnerz says :

      OMG…I was there last night thinking the same thing!

      I just LOVE watching him play. Love it. There’s something so awesome about his game it just makes me happy and the thought of him not playing anymore makes me all sorts of sad and nostalgic already.

      On the ride back to the subway yesterday (and how cool is it that there’s finally a free shuttle to the grounds!?) someone was saying that it was a full house ’cause people realized that he likely won’t play Toronto more than once or twice more (seeing as the men come only every two years) and that it may be one of the last chances to see him live here. *weeps*

      And, on a more shallow note. I loved the pink and brown combo. LOVED.

      Caught part of the Querry/Russell match too. Meh.

      As well as Ferrer/Lopez vs. Tecau/Lindstedt, and yeah, I can see the appeal of Lopez on a sheer physical level (His personality not so much). That man has a seriously delicious body. It was kinda hard to concentrate on the tennis actually, lol.

      • dootsiez says :

        :O Aww you guys, I was hoping to steer clear of the nostalgia for another few years! Tennis Ace, that was a beautiful comment though.

        roadrunnerz – Glad Roger won in front of you yesterday! Sounded like you had a great time. I’m totally not jealous at all! Hmmmmph!

        ❤ ❤

  5. Jack says :

    Roger won….Maria won…..good day yesterday! 😀

    And I don’t really like the colour pink, actually I hate it, but I’m glad Roger went for that shade of pink rather than the in-your-face, burn-your-retinas kind! 🙂

  6. pban says :

    after wimby i thought nothing would ever matter but one look at him through sleepy eyes at 5.30 am shanking his way to Ferdsville and the sick feeling was back….welcome back Feddy

  7. Freudo says :

    thanks, Doots! his transition game was hot hot hot, his feet so fast again, and doing the running forhand very well. Just enough heightened aggression, and execution to keep me hoping. I recently watched a match from long long time ago, already forgot which one it was, maybethe final USO 200?, against Agassi, and was astounded by how many of the things that trouble now, get the lead and give it back, don’t convert on the first seven break point opportunites, as well as all the amazing good stuffs, already in place. Bottom line it’s great to have him back, tanned and healthier looking. Love your strawberry and chocolate fun…

  8. BS says :

    I was really unsure about the pink when I heard he was going to wear it, but I must say that the man can wear anything!! I’m happier than I thought I would be now that he’s back, it’s like seeing an old friend after so long 😛 Long may these winning ways continue. Happy frazzling fellow Fed fans!

  9. schnargle says :

    Re: Ferru – I kind of love it, as well as the rest of him. Don’t hurt me *cowers*

    I’m super happy to see Roger back and winning (and in pink, LOVE), but why the hell is he in Berdych’s quarter again? It’s like the tennis gods want him to fail. Or get revenge. Here’s to hoping it’s the latter.

  10. jfK says :

    I flove Strawberry Rogi, it’s refreshing to see him in a color other than blue! I was hoping he would wear pink last yr in Montreal for the birth of his baby girls.
    Was a great day yesterday for Maria and Roger so I’m happy 😀

  11. jandemom says :

    Got home from vacation last night, turned on Tennis Channel and there was Roger, looking exceptionally good in chocolate and pink. Needless to say, I unpacked today. It was great to see him on court again & while I’m no expert, I thought he played pretty well overall. Positive signs, at the very least, so that’s good. Let’s hope for many more positive signs as the rest of the year unfolds.

    Some of us might have been out of practice frazzling, doots, but it sure came back quickly toward the end of that first set! But if frazzling is the price we must pay to watch Roger, it’s worth it.

    Watching a little of the Djokovic-Benneteau match; they both look like they’re melting out there. Weather has been crazy hot this summer; hope it’s a little better by the USO. I’ve got grounds passes for a couple of days & will be taking my kids; went with my daughter last year but this will be my son’s first visit so we’re excited.

  12. DV says :

    Baby pink is my new favorite color. If someone can pull it of, it’s Roger.

  13. Katarina_YYZ says :

    I was at the match. The outfit looked even better live than on tv/pics. Elegant (and yummy!). So that’s one off my bucket list: see Federer play live.

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