Picspam: Exceptionally attractive people in suits probably won’t make you appreciate your share of the human gene pool, but they WILL soothe that terrible anguish in your privates.
You might be one giant clusterfuck of a tournament from the corny ball girls to the utterly unnavigable website, but bring me Roger Federer doing his squinty Sex-Face at the camera and I WILL LOVE YOU FOREVAZ.
Roger, Rafa, Murray, as well as WTA ladies Aravene Rezai and Safina attended the Madrid Open Gala last night as the tournament kicked off. I’m sure you’ll agree with me that Mr Vavrinec chose an excellent tie for the occasion.
On the other hand, I’m really not digging this spotted navy blue tie and shiny jacket combo from Haggisface. But then again, you can’t go too wrong in black and white.
Every time I see Rafa’s hair, I am overcome by a sudden urge to weep … or look for any canaries flying out from behind his head.
WHY? WHYYY?! WHY DOES XISCA NOT CONFISCATE WHATEVER HAIR PRODUCT HE THINKS HE NEEDS TO USE?
Yes. Marat effing Safin. With his baby sister.
I’m awesome and you’re welcome.
Provided you can see past the sssslew of sssssleaze ssssssslithering off him, Charly Moya really ain’t so bad looking.
I’m just sayin’.
I think everyone took the “black tie” dress code a little too literally.
More Marat, BECAUSE HE DON’T NEED NO EFFING TIE. (In fact, HE DON’T NEED NO EFFING SHIRT.)
It’s just a little unfortunate that Safina looks like his mother in his photo. Oops.
JCF took it upon himself to show Rafa how to use hair products to great effect, with a hairline that resembles the rugged cliffs of Moher. Yumz.
I have no idea why Wogie is squinting in every photo. I’m assuming he thinks that’s his Sex-Face the way some women think pouting is theirs.
Poor deluded puppies. *pouts towards computer screen*
Wait … that’s it? I demand MOAR TENNIS PORN. MOAR!