Wimbledon Day 1: No. I don’t understand either.

You know all is right with this world when your heart pounds in trepidation just thinking about what assault on my cornea Venus Williams might wear a grand slam. Needless to say, she didn’t disappoint – with a jumpsuit inspired by “Grecian influences” and my Nana’s best doona cover.

Yer ready?

All the single ladies …

Vee's back

In truth, it was okay while she was stationary.

Vee's Front


Vee moving.

But reservations over the jumpsuit aside, Venus Williams can wear whatever the fuck she wants as long as she continues to play in this kind of hot tabasco form – easily dispatching Amanmuradova, 63 61. The stats tell a frightening tale – 23 winners, 5 unforced errors, 7 aces, and 1 double fault.

Rock on, Ebony Starr!

In other matches, Murray’s march towards (still!) his first major got off to a stumbling start, when he lost the first set to a rather gun-ho Gimeno Traver, but eventually prevailing 46 63 60 60 under the closed roof.

Recalling Murray’s epic five setter against Ewok under the very same roof 2 years ago, is Murray’s kryptonite … indoor grass?


Franny Schiavone improved upon her 2010 exit yesterday with a bit of a struggle, eventually defeating Dokic 6-4, 1-6, 6-3.

Both players held with relative ease to start off the match, until Franny broke to go up 5-4, and close out the set 6-4. Dokic came out strong in the second set, clobbering her way to a delish baguette 6-1, before a rain delay interrupted her momentum at 1-all in the third. But there’s no denying who plays better on the big stage – Dokic was broken decisively to go down 3-5, and Schiavone struggled to close out the match – barely – 64 16 63.

Despite the tough loss, Dokic sounded optimistic post match that she’ll be seeded by next year’s Australian Open:

My next goal would be (reaching the) top 30 (in the world), being (ranked) 45 now.

I will try to get that, work hard for that until the end of the year. I would like to be seeded at the Australian Open to avoid first rounds like this.

Maybe if I played her in the third round or something, then, you know, you have even more matches (and it) would have been different. I’m in a position where I can kind of think about that now.

While it was all happenin’ down at SW19, Sir Wogie McFudderer found himself a nice, monogrammed sweater-vest – yer know, just in case we didn’t know he was a daddy. (And what is it with reproducing men and sweater vests anyway?) Not to mention the trademark Federdorky caption: “Rain, Rain go away it almost time to start to play!

Uh-oh. Someone’s been talking too much kiddie talk with the twin mangos.


I was SLAYED bitches. SLAYED by Mister Sweatervest.

xx doots


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6 responses to “Wimbledon Day 1: No. I don’t understand either.”

  1. Katarina_YYZ says :

    Actually I liked Venus’s outfit. I mean if I have to choose between that and either seeing her bottom (or the “illusion” of it) or that basket-weave yellow trainwreck from AO — I will pick the weird 70s jumpsuit thingy. At least she looked like a girl — I thought she was playing Baghdatis in her first match.

    As for Rog, I’m not overly in love with the vest or of pairing white with off-white. But he’s still totally huggable.* 😀

    *edited for all-ages audiences.

  2. GIRL FROM MI says :

    Nothing says “I’m a Dork!” like a sweater vest. A handsome, rich, adorable Dork. But still a dork.

    What’s a doona cover?

  3. Puffin says :

    I actually love Roger’s tanktop – it’s rather classy and reminds me of the off-white tanktop that cricketers used to wear quite a few years ago (because I’m a fairly old person! ;)) – which I thought was rather apt yesterday as most of the England cricket team were in the Royal Box watching his match! 😀

    • dootsiez says :

      Not to be a fashion snob or anything 😛 😛 it’s a SWEATER VEST. Wogie McFudderer does not wear “tank tops” 😛

      • Puffin says :

        Lol, Doots! D) I did say I was “old” – in my era, in the UK, we called it a “tank top”!! 😉 But I can live with a sweater vest – I love it, whatever it’s called! 🙂

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